[INTRO MUSIC PLAYING]
Hi, this episode contains a content warning for offscreen violence. Now, it’s time to put your headphones on, sit back and enjoy the divine drama of season 2 episode 4, Alex’s Terrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. Welcome to Echobox.
[ECHO’S THEME PLAYING TO END]
SCENE 1 – ALEX’S APARTMENT
[APARTMENT AMBIENCE]
ECHO: Welcome to Echobox. And, wow. I mean, I know everyone was starving for some news— I know I was. I was almost at the point of searching up some video lessons and learning how to knit. But I didn’t know I was going to get this much feedback just for shining a light on Hades’ new little songbird. And before you bitch at me—
[KEYS JINGLING]
ECHO: —of course they’re not going to announce—
[VOICE FAR AWAY]
DAPHNE: OH MY GOD, ALEX!
ECHO: …They’re not going to announce that—
[DOOR OPENING AND CLOSING]
ALEX: —fuck me. [TURNS OFF VOICE MOD] Fuck me! Can’t fucking record, can’t fucking relax, can’t fucking do anything!
[PACKING AWAY RECORDING EQUIPMENT]
DAPHNE: Alex!
[DOORKNOB RATTLING]
DAPHNE: Alex?
[STILL PACKING AWAY RECORDING EQUIPMENT]
DAPHNE: What are you… feeling yourself?
ALEX: No! Why the fuck would you say that?
[PUTTING RECORDING EQUIPMENT IN DRAWER]
[CLOSING DRAWER]
DAPHNE: I don’t know? Why is your door locked?
[FOOTSTEPS]
[DOOR UNLOCKING AND OPENING]
ALEX (annoyed): Maybe I just want a little privacy? Ever think of that? Wait a minute, is that my dress? Did you raid my closet?
DAPHNE: No. It’s mine. YOU were the one who stole it from MY closet before you moved to LA. I just took back what was mine.
ALEX: [ANNOYED CHUCKLE] You are… unbelievable.
DAPHNE: Whatever. That’s not the point! I want to talk to you!
ALEX: Ugh, me?
DAPHNE (exasperated): Yes, oh my god, I want to talk to my sister for once. You will NEVER GUESS what just happened.
ALEX: You met a cute boy at the bar.
DAPHNE: Yes, but not what I was talking about. But it is about a boy.
ALEX: Great. I’m so glad I’m here for this.
DAPHNE: Oh shut up. Get off your high and mighty horse for a second and LISTEN.
[FOOTSTEPS]
[BOTH SITTING ON THE COUCH]
DAPHNE: LOOK AT THIS!
ALEX: What are you—
[PHONE UNLOCKING]
ALEX: Woah, shit.
DAPHNE: I know right! THE Apollo Olympus is DM-ing me on insta!
ALEX: Let me see that…
DAPHNE: I totally posted that pic of us at Olympus Records and tagged him—
ALEX: Oh my god.
DAPHNE: —and like everyone else and he actually responded asking me how long I’m in town for!
ALEX: Because he wants to fuck you?
DAPHNE: No! Because maybe he wants to talk or go get drinks sometime.
ALEX: Yeah. To fuck you.
DAPHNE: I’m not a piece of meat, Alex. Contrary to your belief, I’m a fucking person.
ALEX: I know that. I’m just trying to prepare you for how these Olympians are. They’ll stick their dicks into anything and everything.
DAPHNE: And what if I want to sleep with him? It’s my fucking choice.
ALEX: Sure, but sorry if I don’t want to see my sister get fucked by every Olympian who dm’s her.
DAPHNE: [SIGH] You’re a bitch, Alex. Look in a fucking mirror. Narcissus fucked you and ghosted you. You should try doing what he did and move the fuck on.
ALEX: Fuck you, Daphne.
[ALEX GETTING UP FROM COUCH]
[FOOTSTEPS, ALEX WALKING AWAY]
[KEYS JINGLING]
DAPHNE: Where are you going?
ALEX: Work. Someone has to pay for this apartment.
DAPHNE: Alex, I’m sorry I said that but you can’t talk to me like that!
[FOOTSTEPS, ALEX WALKING FURTHER AWAY]
ALEX: Whatever.
[DOOR SLAMMING]
[SCENE TRANSITION MUSIC PLAYING]
SCENE 2 – OUTSIDE ALEX’S APARTMENT
[QUIET CITY AMBIENCE WITH BIRDS CHIRPING]
[INDISTINCT CHATTER FROM PEOPLE PASSING BY]
[PHONE CALLING]
ALEX: Pick up… pick up… pick up…
[FOOTSTEPS, ALEX GOING BACK AND FORTH DURING THE WHOLE VOICE NOTE]
ACHILLES (PRE-RECORDED): Hey! What’s up?
ALEX: Achilles! Thank God. Hi.
ACHILLES (PRE-RECORDED): What? WHAT? I can’t hear you.
ALEX: I just said HI!
ACHILLES (PRE-RECORDED): WHAT? You’re breaking up!
ALEX: Where are you… exactly?
ACHILLES (PRE-RECORDED): Yeah. Yeah.
[ACHILLES LAUGHING]
ACHILLES: FUCK OFF HERMES! STOP FUCKING CALLING ME! Please leave a message at the tone.
[PHONE BEEP]
ALEX: Hey bitch. It’s me… Nice answering machine reply. It’s… vintage. Like early 2000’s middle school beat. I fucking hate it. I’m sorry for doing a voice note again. I just— I’m really alone right now.
ALEX: I mean, I know I have you, and Pat by extension. And Daphne… Daphne is… here. She’s here, I guess. My life— isn’t… bad. I have a job people would die and kill for. My podcast is blowing up. But maybe… it’s blowing up… in the wrong way? The tags are just… mean. I guess. I mean, I am a mean person, I know that. But I’m also— you know, a person.
ALEX: I wanted to be famous. Like, real famous. Olympus Records famous. I wanted… the fans. And the fandom, and the messiness, and trending tags. But… as me, Alex. It was fun at first with the Olympians freaking out, all the Hannah Montana moments but… maybe I don’t want to be Hannah Montana, you know? Maybe I want to be Miley Cyrus. You know that scene in the movie where she takes off her wig on the stage? And then she sings that song? Is she singing The Climb on that? I mean— that’s not the point.
ALEX: I don’t want to be an anonymous Echo online. I just— wish people would like me. Me. Not— whatever this is. Fuck. What am I doing…
[SIGHING]
[SNIFFLING]
ALEX: I— gotta get to work. Please call me back when you listen to this. Or, like, don’t. And pretend this never happened, ‘cause, God… this is really pathetic, isn’t it? I love you, Achilles. And you too, Pat, if… if you’re listening. I hope you’re not. This is so embarrassing. Bye.
[SCENE TRANSITION MUSIC PLAYING]
SCENE 3 – INT. OLYMPUS RECORDS LOBBY
[FOOTSTEPS]
[RUSHED FOOTSTEPS]
[GLASS DOOR AT OLYMPUS RECORDS OPENING]
ORPHEUS: Thanks.
[GLASS DOOR AT OLYMPUS RECORDS CLOSING]
[FOOTSTEPS]
HERMES: Oh hey, Alex! You’re actually just the person I wanted—
ALEX: Not now, not now, Hermes.
HERMES: —to see and… oh! What’s the matter?
ALEX: Nothing.
HERMES: Hmmm… Suuuure. Do you wanna—
ALEX: Don’t want to talk about it. Why are you even here?
[A VOICE FAR AWAY]
ORPHEUS: Excuse me! Hey, you! Excuse me!
HERMES: Coffee run for legal.
[RUSHED FOOTSTEPS GETTING LOUDER]
HERMES: Maybe it’s my way into the team! God… Okay, I heard it, just then. Yeah, yeah… I am realizing how pathetic that sounded.
[A PERSON PANTING]
ORPHEUS: Hey, do either of you know Eurydice?
ALEX: No fans unless you’re on a tour.
ORPHEUS: No, no. I’m not a fan. I mean, I’m a fan, but not that way. Orpheus Anapollo. I’m looking for my girlfriend.
HERMES: Sorry, but if we let everyone in here who said they were a “friend” of a signed celebrity, we would meet full capacity.
ALEX: Wait… Orpheus? You’re… not what I pictured.
ORPHEUS: Thanks.
ALEX: You’re looking for Eurydice?
ORPHEUS: Yes. She hasn’t answered my texts, my phone calls, anything! It’s not like her. When she gets like this… in “work mode” she gets in a bad spot, and plus with the media thrown in and Echobox talking about her… I just want to make sure she’s alright.
HERMES: Well, we can’t let anyone beyond here without an ID so—
ALEX: Hermes, I got this.
HERMES: Alex, you’re really not just going to let him walk right in and do —
ALEX: Hermes. I can’t let you back but I can go check on her for you. Let her know that she needs to give you a call, okay?
ORPHEUS: No, that’s what the last intern did and nothing happened. I need to see her myself.
ALEX: I’m Zeus Olympus’ assistant, not an intern, thank you.
ORPHEUS: EURYDICE!
HERMES: What is he DOING?
ALEX: Hey! I can’t let you back there.
[ORPHEUS STRUGGLING TO PUSH THROUGH]
ORPHEUS: Then let me in or stop me. EURYDICE!
ALEX: Wha—
[ALEX GETTING THROWN ON THE GROUND]
[ORPHEUS RUNNING AWAY]
[ALEX GRUNTS]
ALEX: Hermes do something!
HERMES: DO WHAT?
[DOOR OPENING]
[CHAOS AND VOICES COMING FROM THE OTHER OFFICE]
ALEX: I don’t know! Maybe start by getting security before your Dad finds out!
HERMES: Okay! Okay! Stay right there!
ALEX: Jesus.
[ALEX GETTING UP]
[SCENE TRANSITION MUSIC PLAYING]
SCENE 4 – EXT. JUST OUTSIDE OLYMPUS RECORDS
ORPHEUS: Let go of me! HEY! I’m just trying to see my girlfriend.
HADES: Take him outside. Get back to work everyone.
[ORPHEUS GRUNTING AND STRUGGLING]
[FOOTSTEPS, HADES GETTING CLOSER]
HADES: Did you just let him wander inside, Alex?
ALEX: No, I mean, I got trampled, Mr. Olympus.
HADES: I’ll have him charged with battery.
ALEX: Don’t, sir. I’m okay. I’m used to it.
[FOOTSTEPS, HADES GETTING CLOSER TO ORPHEUS]
HADES: You.
ORPHEUS: Hades.
HADES: Mr. Olympus, to you. After all, you just barged in here, trampled over my brother’s assistant, and disrupted the entirety of Olympus Records! Do you know how much time, energy and money you just wasted?
ORPHEUS: Just let me see Eurydice and I’ll go.
HADES: Aristotle and Socrates, give me patience.
ORPHEUS: I know how Olympus Records works! It’s like what Echo says: you’re all vampires that suck the living daylights out of anyone with an effing smithereens of talent!
HADES: You force your way into the office, disrupt my employees, trespassed, battered poor Alexandra here, and commit libel against the Olympus name.
ORPHEUS: You don’t scare me, Hades.
HADES: And you don’t know when to fucking quit do you? Escort him out back. I just made room in my very tight schedule to leave you some parting advice, kid. Leave us.
[FOOTSTEPS, ALEX WALKING AWAY]
[RUSHED FOOTSTEPS, HERMES COMING BACK WITH SOMEONE]
[HERMES PANTING]
HERMES: I just… I just, I just found someone. Where did he go?
ALEX: With Hades. Question: does the office have a back entrance other than where the trucks load in?
HERMES: No, why? You’re not trying to sneak your sister in again, are you?
ALEX: No. If she wants to break in here, she’s one hundred percent on her own.
HERMES: Then, why?
ALEX: Because Hades is taking Orpheus out the back.
[SCENE TRANSITION MUSIC PLAYING]
SCENE 4 – INT. COFFEE SHOP
[COFFEE SHOP AMBIENCE]
[FOOTSTEPS]
ALEX: Here. I brought you napkins too while I was up there.
ARTEMIS: Thanks, Alex… Where’s your drink?
ALEX: Oh. Oh. Yeah, let me… go grab that.
[ARTEMIS GIGGLING]
[FOOTSTEPS, ALEX GETTING HER DRINK AND COMING BACK]
ALEX: Sorry those napkins, uh, distracted me… This place is really nice.
ARTEMIS: Yeah, yeah! My Starbucks gold card went away with my Olympus Records deal so why not put my dollar towards a place like this.
ALEX: Expand your coffee palette.
ARTEMIS: Exactly. So what’s up with you?
ALEX: Me? Oh, you know, trying not to strangle your family during the day and trying not to strangle my own after hours. The usual.
ARTEMIS: So… what I’m hearing is that worlds will collide the second Daphne is invited to an Olympus rager?
[KNOCKING ON TABLE]
ALEX: Knock on wood.
ARTEMIS: Hm, so, a little birdie told me one of mine snuck into Olympus Records?
ALEX: Hermes…
ARTEMIS: Alex, I feel like I need to warn you.
ALEX: Okay?
ARTEMIS: I don’t know exactly what happened between Orpheus and Hades but… Orpheus returned today with some pretty nasty bruises.
ALEX: Oh my God.
ARTEMIS: I know. He’s, he’s okay but… be careful Alex. Olympus Records really hates the Hunters. Or any competition. I don’t know what my family is thinking but please don’t put yourself in danger for me.
ALEX: Trust me, I don’t think Hades is going to beat me because we had coffee together.
ARTEMIS: I know. I’m just, I’m just worried about you. And…And I’m worried about Eurydice too. Keep an eye on her, for me, okay?
[ECHOBOX INTRO PLAYING]
ECHO: Welcome back, bitches. Saddle up. We have A LOT to cover today, but it’s not about the Olympians. They’ve had their time in the spotlight. I’m done with them. Aren’t you done with them? We need some new players to enter… like “the Hunters.” Also, I’m going to be more positive. Because, I have the capacity to be more positive. Contrary to popular belief, I’m a nice person. Sometimes. To people who deserve it. Anyway. Today we’re talking about “the Hunters.” Remember when Artemis defected and started her own indie record label? I sure do. If you don’t, I’ll refresh your memory: Artemis and Apollo were dragged around the world by Zeus until Artemis decided to forge her own path. She started “the Hunters” in opposition to Olympus Records giving the power to the artist instead of the rich white guys at the top. Through crowdfunding and Kickstarter, she was able to come out with her debut solo album— which came with crucial acclaim— and more artists began drifting away from daydreaming about joining the ranks of Olympus Records to instead link arms with Artemis and her “Hunters”. Cut off from Daddy’s money and success, I’d say she did good for herself. And others defected too, like Andromeda and Perseus. Funny how all of Zeus’ queer children left the record.
SCENE 5 – ECHOBOX ESGMENT
ECHO: Don’t think Olympus Records follows the guidelines surrounding their “diverse and inclusive” company slogan that’s paraded around social media in June. Unless… you count Apollo, but I think his pink money doesn’t work very well. Speaking of being paraded around, I would say that if a woman doesn’t want to be found, it means she doesn’t want you anymore. But… exceptions to every rule exist, and Orpheus might just be the exception. As you probably can guess, I’ve been keeping tabs on both Orpheus and Eurydice. What can I say? Every Hollywood love story is as glamorous and trashy as it is tragic. Orpheus apparently made a little appearance at Olympus records yesterday. Multiple witnesses saw him break inside the inner sanctum of the record label trying to find his beloved. Apparently, his songbird wasn’t answering his texts or calls. Maybe that’s because she’s currently trapped in the upper levels of the label in the recording studio. I’ve heard some rumors that she’s under lockdown until either her next single hits the charts or she goes viral on Tiktok. So far it’s been, what? Four days? No one outside the producers or the Olympus’s have seen her. So, in true Orpheus fashion, he broke in— and was met with a very angry Hades. And, sources allegedly say that Orpheus left the record company with some pretty serious bruises and legal trouble. Orpheus, if you’re listening which I know you are, you are single handedly the stupidest person to ever challenge an Olympus, but wonderful job. We’re all rooting for you if you ever decide to go toe to toe with Hades again. Just, be smarter about it, I guess. Well… That’s all for now. Keep your head down and your eyes glued to social media. I’ll see you next week.
[OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING]
This episode stars, in order of appearance, Isabella Sales as Alex/Echo, Tal Minear as Daphne, Emma Blaskelee and Achilles, Bryan Green as Orpheus, Ron Guan as Hermes, Frank Lopez as Hades and Juliana Gutiérrez Arango as Artemis. It was written by Isabella Sales and Corienne Swanson and produced by Corienne Swanson. The Echobox theme song was made by Meg McKellar. Dialogue cut by Marianna Marcon and audio and sound design by Georgia Triantafyllopoulou. Logo design by Lucas Eduardo Bueno and website by Andy Cerdan.
You can find the episode transcript at our website at echoboxpod.com.
Echobox is created out of love for storytelling and provided at no profit to us but we deeply appreciate the hard work our cast and crew put into the show. If you want to help us pay them for their work, support us on our patreon at patreon.com/echoboxpod.
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Thank you for listening. See you next time we open the Echobox!
[OUTRO MUSIC FADING OUT]